Boost Your HAPPINESS With These Tips

It’s 2021, a New Year! But I know for some, it just feels like an endless and bleak continuation of 2020. The restrictions of the Global Pandemic continue with the latest Lockdown 3 in the UK.

Let’s face it we’ve all binge watched Netflix, had more Zoom calls and quizzes than we can count, put on a few extra pounds by rewarding ourselves with a few naughtier food treats, walked/jogged endlessly around our local areas... and that was just Lockdown 1!

So what now….?!

Well, I’ve compiled a few helpful hints/tips below to help you through the continued trying times we’re all currently facing.

Looking Good!

With the continuation of working from home, it’s easier to stay in jogging bottoms with no make-up on and your hair up in a messy bun or fresh from the shower without so much as a comb through! But, looking good is an important part of feeling good. Try to make a bit of an effort and reinstate your old morning routine.

Support ethical businesses by purchasing some new comfy but smart clothes to wear around the house from companies such as Komodo  or if you’re on a bit more of a budget Kotn  

Throw on a bit of lippy or pop on that designer watch you save for special occasions – because why not. You’re still working at home after all!

Healthy treats

Whilst it’s tempting to stock up on pizza and choccy biccys given it’s FREEZING outside, we lose light at 4pm, there’s a national lockdown which means there are no pubs or restaurants open, and on top of that BREXIT!!!! However, eating these foods that are packed full of chemicals that destroy your immune system and will end up making you increase in weight is only going to end up making you feel ultimately worse about everything.

Instead, if you can muster the willpower to create your own snacks in 10 mins there are some great ideas here and if that doesn’t cut it – there are some more awesome recipes here

Move your body

I won’t bore you too much with this one, let’s face it, we all know exercise is good for us. HOWEVER, if you’re currently suffering with mental health, fatigue, depression or SAD; motivation to exercise may be difficult. Whilst exercise is proven to benefit all of these issues, start with moving your body – just move – in whatever form that comes in:

- stand up and sit down several times on the sofa

- walk around your home every hour on the hour

- Do one squat a day or two or three

- Dance around the house to some of your favourite music – get those endorphins released!

- Try 10 star jumps when you get out of bed

- Try stretches every day or every hour

Ultimately, the more you move your body – the better you will feel. AND it’s totally free! Once you get into the habit of moving more, you’ll probably want to start a fitness routine which will improve your mental health tenfold. More here on the benefits of exercise – thank you NHS!

Creative Writing

We’ve all connected far more than ever via online sources during the last year. But now we all have a bit more time on our hands – what about going back to basics. Remember how great it used to be to receive a hand written letter that wasn’t a bill (sorry millennials – it’s what we did before social media!!) Maybe take some time to write letters to your nearest and dearest – to do nothing more than to brighten their day.

A lot of elderly and vulnerable people are sheltering at the moment so I’m sure a hand written letter would brighten their day. A lot of inspiration for letter writing can be found here thank you @CATSAUNDERS

Self-Reflect

Lockdown is a great time to reflect inwardly. What are you good at? What do you love? What is your passion? Have you achieved what you’ve wanted to in life? What would you like to do more of? What would your 80 year old self look back and say about you? If you had a magic wand…what would you do differently? What do you hope to achieve once restrictions are lifted?

All in all, my final tip is don’t be too hard on yourself. These are really trying times for every single one of us in different ways and we are all just trying to get through it. So if you feel like you’re not doing enough, don’t be too hard on yourself. Let’s keep going – doing whatever that is to keep going and at some point, life may just get a bit less difficult.

The 3 Most Important Lessons The Pandemic Has Taught Me

As we start to slowly ease out of lockdown I’m taking these moments to reflect on what these past few months have taught me. There has been so much to learn from. I’m going to share my experience of the last three months in all its vulnerable authenticity so that you can see what I learned and why I wanted to share.

My story

As some of you may know already, I was overseas in Singapore for a while last year (which was incredible) and I returned to the UK in December – I feel so grateful to have had that experience prior to such a severe global travel restriction.

I was very lucky to gain a new contract job based in London with a January start date. For those of you who don’t know, I am getting married this year (I say woop, my bank balance says blergh!), so consistency in contracts and finances is more important than ever!

I worked in this role successfully for just 3 months when the beast we know as Coronavirus swooped in and turned everyone’s world upside down and inside out. It was a shock for me because as a result of this, I was made redundant with immediate effect. This effected my world more than it usually would because I had planned my finances down to the last penny due to the wedding being this year. There also seemed to be a massive recruitment freeze and on top of all of this my partner’s wage was also unexpectedly reduced by 20% as well.

Like so many others, suddenly, and almost overnight we had gone from being able to live comfortably and afford our wedding later this year to pondering over how we were going to pay for groceries and afford the rest of our wedding that was already half paid for and of which we were of course tied in to.

A few emotions kicked in during these moments. Fear, desperation and anger followed very quickly by resilience and a burning drive to survive this and put up the middle finger to this pandemic.

I spent a good few days in the aftermath of the shock of all of this thinking innovatively and creatively. In fact, within an hour of my losing my job I was already applying for more opportunities online and reaching out to connections. I felt an overwhelming sense of panic – for anyone who has got married or is getting married, you know the cost of venues; these are in the thousands not hundreds. I had to find a solution to this problem.

Although I was applying for different contracts, there wasn’t much in the way of new opportunities around me to apply for much more. The world was going into shutdown and I felt like I was getting sucked down with it. I knew I had all these large and committed upcoming outgoings but no way to pay them.

To make matters worse (yep, now’s the time to get your violins out!) I was not eligible for any government financial support as my partner was still earning a wage and we live together. My previous employer took the decision to not Furlough me so despite giving my best efforts to that role I was given no support from the company even though this was at minimal risk and cost to themselves. Their reasoning was it was too high a risk to them when they were losing nearly all their revenue for the foreseeable future. For me it was the minimum they could do so I wasn’t on the bread line – there was a reason the government created this scheme to help protect people’s jobs – it felt beyond selfish that they were not honouring it in any way.

I remember I applied for jobs at supermarkets just to get by and got generic rejection letters from most of them as they were full! I felt like no one was giving me a branch.

It was a really weird time for me as I am usually pretty organised with money. I just felt like we were spiralling down a black hole. Panic buying became the new normal for people and the supermarket shelves were empty, no one knew what the virus was, how it was transmitted or what we should or shouldn’t be doing. It was mass hysteria and confusion multiplying by the day and breeding across social media platforms, fed by people’s curiosity and fear.

Reasons to stay positive

It was in this moment of knee jerk reactions all around me that some networking from the previous year paid off. A contract landed in my inbox and I was hired to work on a series about Frontline Workers during the pandemic. It was a 6 week miracle shining the light on some amazing people doing some really amazing things. I couldn’t have wished for a more productive and inspiring contract to be working from home on during these strange times!

Shortly after this I landed another contract starting in June which was again down to some hard work paying off.

Luckily, due to a lot of my coaching sessions and workshops being held online, it hasn’t affected my capacity to carry out sessions too much either. You can find out more information about the sort of coaching packages I offer here. Do get in touch for more information about what the different coaching packages will entail.

Learning something new

Upon reflection of all these strange turns of events, I can say the three most important takeaways for me have been:

1.       Never put off for tomorrow, what you can achieve today

The sentiment of this is something that I normally carry with me as I do get a sense of satisfaction in being proactive and getting things ticked off my To Do list. But it was so deeply heightened by the pandemic. I’m so glad I got to travel and get wedding paperwork sorted before there was a global shut down for a couple of months.

2.       This too shall pass

Another saying that I always keep close to my heart but that was cemented during the coronavirus outbreak. Every state is temporary. The desperation I felt as I lost work and all of the doors seemed to close around me was soon over in just a matter of weeks. If I had known this was going to be the outcome, how differently would I have spent those weeks? Instead of feeling fear and anger what would I felt instead? How much more productive and enjoyable would those two weeks of my life have been? As Dalia Lama said:

“Inner peace is the key: if you have inner peace, the external problems do not affect your deep sense of peace and tranquillity… without this inner peace, no matter how comfortable your life is materially, you may still be worried, disturbed, or unhappy because of circumstances.”

3.       Resilience

Resilience has been one of the most powerful and useful emotional responses I ever learned. It’s so important to remain grounded in this very temporary world. I think it’s all too easy for all of us to become complacent and think that our lives will continue on the trajectory we’ve paved for ourselves. But I think it’s all too easy to forget that sometimes it won’t, sometimes, overnight, something may happen and our world will turn upside down and we have to learn to cope with that. To adapt to that and to not let that consume our entire being.

Self-care is extremely important in maintaining resilience and a level head during hard times. You can read more about tips for managing self-care in my early blog this year here

Afterword

One of the most inspiring things that I noticed during this pandemic was how adaptable and truly versatile we all are as a species. Whilst I was catching my breath, and scrambling to keep my head above water, all around me on social media people were popping up with innovative ideas on virtual everything from PTs (shout out to Seven Movement) to House Parties to Quizzes to those who could working from home. It happened within literally the space of one week and it was truly inspiring and overwhelming to see.  I really enjoyed reading tips from Olivia in her blog What Olivia Did here it is reassuring to know that whilst we are all going through different things, we truly are all in this together.

I think it’s safe to say we will return to some sense of normality, but I know there’s a lot of the old normal I’d like to leave behind. Here’s to a new era of innovative thinkers! Let’s have a drink to this new chapter (when the pubs open of course!)

5 Tips To Manage The Winter Blues On A Budget

It’s that time of year when we all go about our daily lives pretending to be okay – but I think the truth of the matter is, a lot of us are suffering with our own internal battles.

In the UK, it’s that time of year after the festive season when it’s still cold outside, the weather is somewhat undesirable, the nights are drawing in from sometimes as early as 3pm and our purse strings are feeling the pinch after the festivities of Xmas and New Year. It’s no wonder January is deemed to be the most depressing month of the year. Typically the third Monday of the month has even been renamed as Blue Monday! So what can we do about it?! Find below five practical tips on how to keep holding on to a positive mind set without breaking the bank.

Volunteer

Volunteering is a great way of becoming part of your local community that is focusing on social issues outside of yourself and contributing to fantastic causes. If you can spare even a couple of hours a week, then there are some fantastic charities that you can work with. As well as benefiting other causes, it really helps to give you a sense of perspective for your own struggles as well. Whilst volunteering generally doesn’t pay you, it is something that you can do for free that will help you feel a sense of positive accomplishment and who knows what those opportunities may lead to in the future.

Click here for some excellent opportunities in the UK and here for some amazing volunteering opportunities internationally.

Self-care

When we feel down, it’s very easy to neglect our own needs. Sometimes all we might feel like doing is hiding under the duvet. Whilst one day of pure self-indulgent rest is not a bad thing, more than that can be quiet damaging to self-esteem and motivation.

So whether it is cooking a nutritious meal, having a hot bath (if you’re lucky enough to have one!) going for a walk or run in the daylight every day, taking your vitamins or doing something that you enjoy such as drawing, painting or knitting, make sure you are doing one thing every day to take care of yourself. This will really help boost your mental state as well.

Exercise

This was touched upon briefly in the Self-Care section. But to re-iterate; you cannot underestimate the importance of exercise in boosting your mood and releasing those endorphins. If you can’t afford a gym membership, there are plenty of other alternatives to daily exercise to suit all levels.

From going for a stroll in a local park, to going for a jog or run, to You Tube videos in your own home (space permitting!). I highly recommend clicking here for @thebodycoach Joe Wick’s workouts on You Tube for high intensity workouts leaving you feeling vitalised and ready to face the world – they can also be done pretty much anywhere, result!

Stay connected

In today’s fast paced world with so many different online social media options, it’s easy to forget you maybe haven’t physically seen or actually spoken to anyone at all week. Make sure that at least once a week you are connecting with friends/family or even strangers. Pick up the phone and maybe have a chat to someone who doesn’t live near you or alternatively arrange meet ups locally with friends or family. In addition, have a chat to the staff in local shops, or on public transport or at the library. It’s funny, but sometimes a cheery hello from someone you don’t know can really lift your mood. It’s so easy to forget the simplicity of human connection in today’s culture, but it is really important and one of the key 7 human needs. You can read more about the other 6 here where Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is explained in a bit more detail.

Set positive focus

Whilst goal setting and setting New Year’s resolutions doesn’t work for everyone, defining positive focus is a definite winner!

Pick one area of your life that you want to make an improvement on. List all the things you would like to experience in this area of your life. Really think about how this will make you feel. Hold on to that feeling. Then set a date where you will be able to commit to doing just one thing to move you closer to those positive changes within this area in your life. Don’t forget the way you want that to make you feel. Make sure to continue making small steps regularly that over a longer period of time will help you make the larger desired changes within that area of your life.

DO CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR IF YOU ARE EXPERIENCING PROLONGED PERIODS OF SADNESS OR DEPRESSION.

Winning Tactics For SUCCESS

What is success?

Success can mean different things to different people. For some it’s money, for others it’s family, for other people it may be status or assets. So in order to be successful you first need to establish exactly what that means for you.

I recommend writing it down because then it becomes more real, you can stick it up on your wall somewhere where you will see it every day so you are constantly reminded what success means for you.

For me personally, success is 360° contentment. What do I mean by that? I mean that I believe true success comes from a healthy mind, body, spirit and outlook. When one of these factors are out of sync I believe it leads to unhappiness and unfulfillment. Unhappiness and unfulfillment may get in the way of you reaching your true potential and in turn prevent you from becoming successful.

A healthy mind

For me, mindset is everything. Looking after your mind is laying the foundation for your success. It’s making sure that you have balance within your mind. So you are practicing mindfulness through meditation, breath work, and being present.

It’s about living in the moment so instead of multitasking in everything you do; you’re actively trying to think about just one task at a time in the moment you are doing it. Cleaning your teeth you are thinking about your teeth rather than tomorrow night’s dinner and so on.

A healthy mind also requires positivity. The mind loves to focus on the negative; it’s drawn to it in fact. In order to maintain a healthy mind, we need to actively seek out the positivity and repeat those positive mantras so that we are attracting positivity into our lives rather than negativity.

Positive people attract positive people. Positive thoughts attract positive thoughts. It’s the law of attraction.

A healthy body

In order to take care of other people and tasks such as work and dependants, first we need to look after ourselves. We need to take care of our bodies which function like machines. Food is the fuel. We need to be making sure we are eating a healthy balanced nutritional diet and taking regular daily exercise. This is interlinked with maintaining a healthy mind because a good workout at the gym is proven to reduce stress and what does reduced or eliminated stress give us? A healthy mind. The health and safety announcement on an airplane advises you to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others. We need to apply this to life, first we take care of ourselves so that we can be strong and dependable for other people.

A healthy spirit

I know some of you may be thinking well what’s a healthy spirit? Sounds like airy, fairy nonsense? Well sure, but I think we can all relate to a time when we’ve walked into a room and the energy in there is so low that if we’ve been in a great mood, it’s instantly changed our state from positive to heavy and down or we may even start to feel negative. Or, there’s that one person in the office who no matter what you talk to them about they find the negative to moan about and it instantly brings your mood down.

This is your spirit. You want to attract positivity, wealth and health into your life and you do this by living positively. Having a healthy, happy spirit. It’s about having good energy and passing on positive vibes. So if you have a bad experience happen to you, reflect upon the learning from that negative experience and take away the positive from it. There is a positive to all bad situations if you fight to look hard enough. And it is a fight, life is HARD, there’s no denying it, but the positivity is truly there if you want to see it. One of my favourite quotes of all time is by Roald Dahl:

“Watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.”

I’ve lived my life by this little mantra. It’s so true – there is magic and positivity everywhere – it’s just sometimes harder to find or see it. Sometimes negativity clouds our vision. Sometimes it’s just easier to be cynical and choose to let our negative beliefs limit us.

A healthy outlook

For me a healthy outlook is one that recognises what is happening but chooses to find the positivity, learning and development from every situation. This isn’t always easy either, but it is always possible. It is important to acknowledge feelings of hurt, anger, upset, despair – sometimes things do feel unfair. But once we’ve taken as much time as we need to feel that pain/frustration or anger we need to then learn and apply to our lives the lesson from it. Life repeats patterns to teach us lessons, only when we apply our learning do these negative patterns or cycles stop occurring.

Stats and Facts

For those of you who believe the proof is in the science – please click here and let me refer you to this article showing various studies that support the majority of what I mention above. Furthermore, click here for an article exploring the science behind the law of attraction – there’s also much more available on the internet about this – so don’t listen to me! Explore your own research!

Wishing you positivity in abundance and I hope you too can live a successful life by applying the 360° approach.

Improve Your HAPPINESS in 3 days

Spring is here, the winter blues have subsided and our moods are lifted…or are they? One thing for sure is that 45,000,000 people search for how to be happy on Google alone, EVERY SINGLE month.

Isn’t that number staggering! 45,000,000 people. That’s not including people who don’t have access to laptops/computers and not including people who use alternative search engines either.

If millions of people are still searching for this every month, it means that fundamentally we have something missing in our society.

Throughout my coaching journey I have learned how to apply coaching and mindfulness techniques to my days so that I am aware of my state. This in turn means that my state is more positive than negative the majority of the time. So I find it easier to feel happy essentially.

I wanted to share these techniques so that you can apply them to your days and ultimately improve your happiness within just 3 days.

The first step in improving your happiness

Firstly, anxiety/depression/low mood can be caused primarily from living too much in the future or past rather than the present. What this means is we worry about what will happen next year if we’re still in this situation or how what we did last year brought us to this situation. The key here is to look at the present moment only and consider how you can make this a success. What can you do to make today the best it can be? How can changing your perspective on things and not being too judgemental change how you feel and your current state? So for example, instead of thinking about all the negatives of your current job, consider the positives. Firstly, write a list of all the positives that go with your current role, whether it’s money, location, job satisfaction or stability. Instead of moaning about the negatives voice the positives daily – it will really help to lift your mood and remind you why you are doing what you are doing. The human mind naturally focuses on the negative rather than the positive so whenever that negative inner chatter rears its head, have a think about the positives again. Re-train your mind.

Of course, if you can’t think of any positives to do with your current situation, then it might be time to consider how you can make small steps to make a positive change to improve your situation. Then set a date by when you will achieve each step. This will move you closer to where you want to be.

Physiological happiness

Secondly, happiness is not only emotional it’s physiological as well. How can you improve your physical state? I enjoy going to the gym and I incorporate this into my daily routine. For you it may be swimming, yoga, pilates or dance classes. Whatever exercise you think you will enjoy and commit to for at least 3 times a week, I recommend you do that. It’s very hard to feel low after a great workout. I can recommend Pure Gym for cheap 24 hour access to gyms and classes if finding the time to get to a gym is problematic for you. For a higher end gym experience I can recommend Nuffield Health who offer amazing facilities with plenty of space for you to work out.

Psychological happiness

Finally, happiness is about training your mind. Mindfulness can really help with getting the most pleasure out of your days. There are many mediation apps such as Insight Timer and Headspace which are free and provide guided meditation and other exercises for all levels whether you’re a beginner or not. It’s also important to consider your sleep patterns. Making sure you’re getting enough quality sleep is imperative in having a healthy/happy mind. Make sure you turn off your screens at least half an hour before going to bed. Consider meditating, having a relaxing bath, or reading a book half an hour before bed to help your mind wind down ready for a relaxing sleep. Sleep is important because it is the time the body uses to repair any damaged cells, boost your immune system, recover from the day’s activities and recharge your heart and cardiovascular system for the next day.

In conclusion

My top tips for improved happiness within just 3 days…

1.       Focus all your energy on the present moment and make sure it’s positive energy

2.       Exercise for at least an hour a day 3 times a week

3.       Download a meditation app and meditate morning and night before bed

4.       Make sure you’re getting enough quality sleep

5.       For more clarity on your direction and for discovering action steps to help you get to where you want to be, please book in your free consultation coaching session with me via my website https://www.bethinkcoaching.com/get-in-touch